Seeking roommates who understand that this isn't just a house—it's a German Shepherd embassy with human staff!
THE DEAL: 2 rooms available in a 3-bedroom house where the REAL owners (two German Shepherds) have graciously allowed humans to cohabitate. Previous applicants have been rejected for "inadequate belly-rubbing skills" and "suspicious lack of treat-giving potential."
WHAT YOU GET:
Access to a kitchen (note: counter surfing is the dogs' constitutional right)
Living room (the couch dent is dog-shaped for a reason)
Laundry facilities (fur removal is your responsibility)
Garage (cars optional, space for emergency dog toy storage mandatory)
Bathroom conveniently located next to your room (shower singing will be critiqued by canine critics)
WHAT'S INCLUDED:
Wi-Fi (password is definitely NOT "GoodBoy123")
Water (some exclusively reserved for dramatic dog slurping)
Electricity split by usage (dog nightlight usage non-negotiable)
ROOM OPTIONS:
Furnished (pre-tested for dog nap comfort)
Unfurnished (perfect blank canvas for dog hair collection)
IDEAL ROOMMATES:
Must pass the sniff test (literally)
Should understand that "personal space" is a concept the dogs have never heard of
Must accept that you rank third in household decisions, after Dog #1 and Dog #2
If you're still reading and not deterred by the prospect of living with four-legged roommates who will judge your dating choices and late-night snacking habits, please send an email!
No cats. The management (dogs) have been quite clear on this point.